A Christian approach to peacemaking revolves around three behavioral encouragements that are very simple to talk and to write about, by very hard to practically accomplish.
- Believers are encouraged to confront first one at a time, then in two’s, then in the sight of the church.
- Believers are encouraged to confront in love and to seek understanding first, rather than judgment.
- Believers are encouraged to avoid confronting in the law first (via litigation) and to instead confront in the Spirit.
Think about how often we get into conflicts—in the workplace, in our families, even in our churches—and how rarely we exercise the first step of positive confrontation.
The initial step is hard, confrontation, because we would sometimes rather be right, than be reconciled.
But when we favor “rightness” over reconciliation, we do not allow the better angels of our nature to truly work on our hearts.
Would you rather be right, or be reconciled?
[See: KJV Matthew 5:21-26; Luke 17:3-4; Romans 12:18; Matthew 18:15-17]
-Peace Be With You All-
Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: hsconsultingandtraining@gmail.com
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Church conflicts should always consider the process of Matthew 18 and the goal is reconciliation instead of being “right.” Even in cases of church discipline in which a person is caught up in a sinful, destructive behavior, the goal is that they would be reconciled to God and to the church, not for the church to prove its point. While church discipline may be necessary especially when a person’s behavior is causing strife and disunity in the church, it is not meant to punitive but restorative. In light of this, however, not everyone will be restored and the truth is that we can only control our own attitude before God. But the goal must always be reconciliation whether or not the person responds.
Thanks for commenting Steve!
Church conflicts should always consider the process of Matthew 18 and the goal is reconciliation instead of being “right.” Even in cases of church discipline in which a person is caught up in a sinful, destructive behavior, the goal is that they would be reconciled to God and to the church, not for the church to prove its point. While church discipline may be necessary especially when a person’s behavior is causing strife and disunity in the church, it is not meant to punitive but restorative. In light of this, however, not everyone will be restored and the truth is that we can only control our own attitude before God. But the goal must always be reconciliation whether or not the person responds.