[Advice] Business Mentors II

Business mentors are not the most important parts of your business, but they are definitely an integral portion of the game.

Happy_Employees

Good business mentors can provide three things:

  • Sound, positive feedback that is both constructive and developmental
  • The space to know when to let you fail, and when to push you to succeed
  • Emotional distance from your “next great idea”

They can’t prevent you form making the next big mistake, nor can they really help you launch and iterate. But they can form the basis of a potential Board of Directors, and sometimes, they may take on a role that’s even more important for the savvy peace builder:

Fans.

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: jsorrells@hsconsultingandtraining.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

[Advice] Business Mentors I

Business mentors for the savvy peace builder are just as important for the development of long-term success as are other elements of building a project.

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No peace builder can truly “go it alone” but too many get trapped in silos, or behind clients, believing that they will just “learn the building of a business on the fly.”

This never works.

Our recommendation: Design a personal Board of Directors. This should consist primarily of professionals with industry experience who have no emotional investment in the success or failure of your venture.

Then, meet with them once a month (at minimum) and treat them to coffee. Listen to their ideas and expertise, but also keep your own council.

A great resource to begin this process (that’s free) is your local chapter of SCORE (link here).

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: jsorrells@hsconsultingandtraining.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

[Strategy] It Is Easier…

It is easier to sit and wait for a situation to change because of external circumstances, than it is to do the hard work of failing.

CRaaS In the Workplace

It is easier.

  • Just like it is easier to ignore conflicts in your midst and act like nothing is going wrong inside of your organization, your family, your neighborhood, or even your country.
  • Just like it is easier to shrug your shoulders and let “someone else” do the hard work of confronting, challenging and changing your world (in the social sciences we call this the Bystander Effect).
  • Just like it is easier to put your metaphorical head down, plow forward and only look up when the week is over, the client/customer seems “satisfied” or the “job is done.”

The hard emotionally challenging work of trying and potentially failing is not for the faint of heart. It requires commitment, perseverance, grit, resiliency, accountability and a sense of responsibility to the people, the process, the change and the outcome.

Leaders in organizations that honor this hard, emotional labor flourish. Those in organizations that don’t, falter and eventually quit—quite trying, quit failing, even quit caring.

In our most recent presentation to a corporate group, we encouraged the leaders in the room to lead and to take up the mantle of failure in three ways:

  • Understand yourself first—We keep going back to it, but from understanding conflict, to understanding leadership, to understanding communication: physician heal thyself.
  • Care about the process—People don’t lead who don’t care about people, relationships, or processes. This is a tough realization and a man in the presentation came up to us and said “I realize after you said that people don’t lead who don’t care, that I often tell people that I don’t care and that ‘it takes a lot to offend me, so don’t even try.’ Maybe I should change that.”

Yes.

  • Build relationships—In any organization, whether it’s a family, a neighborhood or a company, we can only successfully lead through building relationships with people, not processes. People change before things.

One last point: Commitment, ethics, integrity and character in challenging the process must be in place before leadership through challenging the process can truly begin. Teach and nurture commitment and leadership will follow.

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: jsorrells@hsconsultingandtraining.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

[Podcast] Earbud_U Episode #5 – Diane Lange

Earbud_U Episode #5- Diane Lange Owner & Founder, Proclivity, LLC., Entrepreneur,Organizational Development Consultant, Corporate Trainer, Author & Blogger

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There are times that I talk with people in fields associated with mine, who are doing things in a different way than I am doing them but are getting the same—or even better—results than I am.

I think that this interest comes about because I am inherently a generalist in a world of specialists.  I think that my interest also stems from being deeply ensconced in the interdisciplinary aspects of conflict resolution and reconciliation.

As human beings in an economic and social world, only beginning to recover from the hangover of the Industrial Revolution, our responsibility is to be interdisciplinary.

We can’t know everything, that’s the point of the social web; but we also have a responsibility to make as many connections between disparate pieces of information as is humanely possible.

That’s where organizational development and conflict resolution practitioners can really shine, because in a world of specialists, sometimes it takes a broad thinking generalist to make the connections that many organizations can’t—and won’t—make.

Diane Lange has taken some time away from Proclivity, LLC, but she is always going to be an entrepreneur, a founder and an active thinker. You should get her into your organization.

Here’s all the ways to connect with her:

Diane Lange & Proclivity, LLC on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ProclivitlLlc?sk=info&tab=overview

Diane Lange on Twitter: https://twitter.com/prodiane

Diane Lange on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dianelange

Proclivity, LLC Website & Blog: http://proclivityllc.com/

Self-Directed Leadership: http://proclivityllc.com/self-directed-leadership/

Download the Latest Episode of Earbud_U!

[Podcast] Earbud_U Episode #1 – Darren MacDonald

[Podcast] Earbud_U Episode #1 – Darren MacDonald, Corporate Consultant, Start-Up Investor, Web Commerce Guru

[Podcast] Earbud _U Episode #1 - Darren Macdonald

[powerpress]

Occasionally, you get top start on a project that is the beginning of a new direction and my interview here with Darren MacDonald, is the perfect example of that beginning interview.

Darren is funny, engaged and a totally great guy overall. And whiplash smart.

He worked in the bottled gas field with a family business for almost twenty years, and knows a thing or two about conflict and engaging with it effectively and not ruffling feathers.

He’s involved in a ton of projects and it’s always a laugh riot when we get together. I loved talking to him and he’s the only guest on Earbud_U to get a “Director’s Cut,” which I will release…someday…soon…

Feel free to connect with Darren via LinkedIn

His website & blog: http://darrenmacdonald.com/

His presence on Quora: http://www.quora.com/Darren-MacDonald#

On Twitter: https://twitter.com/upwordz

Check out the interview above!

Or, link to Soundcloud here–>https://soundcloud.com/jesan-sorrells/earbud_u-episode-1-it-all-comes-down-to-darren-macdonald

Download the Latest Episode of Earbud_U!

[Advice] 3 Entrepreneurial States

There are three emotional states that can catch hold of the entrepreneurial peace builder as she is building her project:

YES!

  • The fear which is accompanied by every new decision
  • The exhilaration when a client is helped and “closed’
  • The dread of returning to working for “the Man”

The employee mindset is built on the idea of stability, predictability and “money that will always be there.”

The employee mindset still dominates, even in our post-Industrial world.

This mindset also tolerates bad behavior, ego driven decision making, and gives away its autonomy for dollars.

The detoxification process than the savvy peace builder experiences as she moves confidently through dread, fear and exhilaration, while also holding onto her employee life, ensures that—once her definition of success is realized—she will never go back to “golden handcuffs” ever again.

And she’ll be no good to any large organization—other than as an equal to be negotiated with, a competitor to be crushed or a morsel to be gobbled up.

The three emotional states—and their impacts— are integral to overcome because the road back to the “golden handcuffs” is a long one indeed.

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: jsorrells@hsconsultingandtraining.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

[Strategy] Top 4 Outcomes of Emotional Intelligence

In a negotiation, absolute emotional intelligence corrupts certain outcomes.

CRaaS In the Workplace

  • Outcomes where one party feels as though they were take advantage of
  • Outcomes where both parties feel as though the negotiation was a waste of time and effort.
  • Outcomes where one party isn’t sure that the other party dealt with their needs in “good faith”
  • Outcomes where both parties feel as though they are handcuffed to each other by virtue of the way in which agreement was concluded

Absolute emotion intelligence feels unattainable for many negotiators, because caring about someone else’s motivations and emotions, opens the door to cooperative—rather than coercive—power.

And, let’s admit, coercion sometimes feels good. But isn’t it our higher calling, to put aside what feels good in the moment, to do what is good for the long-term?

Even if the long-term is defined by the parameters of the contract language…

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: jsorrells@hsconsultingandtraining.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

[Advice] 3 Steps for Reframing Organizations

Many organizations still prefer to litigate—or lobby for legal changes—to protect their standing in the open market.

Hire_For_Soft-Skills_Train_For_Hard_Skills

This includes not just external protections, such as market access, intellectual property protection and copyrights on branding efforts, but also, internal protections around hiring, recruiting, onboarding, and resolving internal employee disputes.

Organizations and businesses still handle conflict as a product rather than as a process. This comes with the perspective of conflict resolution—however they are resolved—as “the way we do things around here.” This leads to thinking of conflict resolution as just another method of gaining a favorable organizational outcome.

However, by focusing on the design of the architecture of their internal conflict resolution systems, organizations can evolve beyond merely protecting their place in the market and move toward innovating with people.

Here are three steps to accomplishing this:

  • Creating new design architecture requires unbundling every step in the hiring to firing funnel and reexamining all of the assumptions that are baked into your organization, particularly those around the idea of “who gets to work here.”
  • Developing new design architecture requires dissecting the culture of an organization and determining what the real purposes of the organization are, not just the purposes displayed on the masthead, or for stakeholders.
  • Embedding a new design architecture for resolving conflicts requires a transforming of organizational thinking around conflict—shifting from thinking of conflict as an unfortunate by product of another process to be resolved as quickly as possible and in the organization’s favor, to thinking of conflicts as a process to be engaged with as a a natural part of evolution, growth and innovation.

Unbundling, dissecting and transforming will take any organization toward building a conflict resolution system as a service working for employees and other stakeholders, rather than a service working against employees and other stakeholders.

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: jsorrells@hsconsultingandtraining.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

[Advice] The Hard Thing About Now Its Too Late

The savvy peace builder is either all in—or not.

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But, at a certain point, financial realities take over and the rent must be paid, or the electric bill, and the savvy peace builder must make the choice to make making peace a side hustle.

Now, typically the word hustle comes with negative connotations, but mostly it should be associated with little sleep and much success.

But, when the main work (the 40 hour grind) takes over more and more time and energy from the hustle that matters (the peacemaking pursuit) the savvy peace builder will sometimes kill the side hustle by dividing time away from it even further.

This is how many entrepreneurial ventures end, dissected and subdivided under the scalpel of the 40 to 60 hour work week and the “sure” thing that brings security, a steady paycheck and fewer uncomfortable conversations with spouses and children.

The tough decision—the hard thing about this hard thing—is that diversification of focus and talents leads to more work not less; but making the decision to keep it to one-and-a-half hustles makes all the difference between “man I’m glad I lost sleep to build this project” and “man, I wish I’d taken the time when I had it to build this project. But now it’s too late.”

Now, it’s too late.

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: jsorrells@hsconsultingandtraining.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

[Advice] What to Do When You have Issues…

…and you will.

What_To_Do_When_You_Have_Issues

There will be days when no one will take your cold calls, your warm calls, or even a hot call.

There will be days when the family, the children, the house and other distractions will seem to crowd out the endless stream of productive work that you know you have to do.

There will be days when you will get angry/depressed/despondent/melancholy and it will seem to others that are outside of your internal mental circus that you are actually not all that engaged with reality.

There will be days when, no matter how many accolades and “thank yous” you will receive, they will seem to roll off of your back in the face of mounting debts, panic and fear of imminent failure.

On the days that the conflict consultant has these issues, she should push back from the table, take a break and go have coffee with a trusted friend or colleague.

Physical activity also helps, in taking a walk, or going for a run.

Finally, on the days when the committed conflict consultant has issues the most important thing to remember is that this too, shall pass.

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: jsorrells@hsconsultingandtraining.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/